What a day...

I felt like we were trapped in that Simpson's episode yesterday. The one where they keep going, "YAAAY!.... Boooo...... YAY!!!.... BOOOO... Yaaaaay!..... BOO!"

Marc is on Spring Break this week and I work from home on Fridays so I have the flexibility to get out and run a few errands here and there. We dropped Fletch off at school and make our first task to stop at Walgreens to get passport sized photos for our dossier. The printer getting jammed was the first irritation of the day, but the day got so much worse that the Walgreens story isn't even worth getting into. (Booo) We did leave with a bag of 75% off Easter chocolate (Yay!) which I've already eaten a lot of (Boo). Costs: $16 (not counting the chocolate of course)

Next we run up to the police station in the mall and find out it's not open yet (Boo) but I did get to use the mall bathroom (Yay - I think?). So we continue on to the main police station for our city and they're able to give us a police clearance letter, on their letterhead, signed and stamped (Yay) but it's not notarized and they don't have a notary there (Boo). Costs: $14

The bank is close by, so we stop in to get everything notarized. My favorite notary boy is there (Yay) and I'm sure he'll just go ahead and notarize the police clearance for us. But he doesn't (Boo) and he also can't notarize Power of Attorney forms (double Boo).

On we go downtown to my doctor's office to drop off my original hand-written letter and ask him to have it typed instead and change some wording on it. The receptionist says "Sure, I can type that up for him! (YAY!) But he's off on Friday's so he can't sign it until Monday or Tuesday." (Boo) At least it's delivered and off my plate now. Speaking of plates we decided on an early lunch at our favorite Thai restaurant that's just up the street from my doctor. (Yaaaaaaay!!)

While there, I call our social worker to tell her about the whole police clearance thing and how it's only for the city we live in, not for the whole state like the dossier instructions indicate it should be. And also that they don't have notaries there, but it is stamped with the police dept stamp. We're told it has to be whole state and notarized (boo) but that the main Denver police department is only a few minutes from where we were eating lunch so maybe they can help (yay). We get there, park, and there's already money in the parking meter (score!) but they confirm what our p.d. said - each city only does clearances for that city and not for the whole state. If we want whole state, we have to go to the Colorado Bureau of Investigation. (Boo Boo BOO).

20 minutes later we get to CBI, explain what we're doing, fill out a form and they say it will take 3 - 5 days to get it back (yay? boo? I don't even know at this point). I hand the lady an example letter that came with our dossier paperwork of what we need the letter to say. She blows us off "We have our own letter we use." I try to explain that Ethiopia (our agency? who knows?) has very specific wording that they want and could I please just attach this to my request so they know what I want? "No, our letter is professional and includes much more information that this. We know what we're doing." (boo hoo hoo) We leave, downtrodden, exhausted... Costs: $30

Back at home I try to salvage what's left of the day and get some work done. I actually got some good news about one of my candidates and a potential offer for a contract (Yay!)

But then I also got word / found out that:

• The CBI clearance is not right and they use "negative language" and the dossier instructions state that it needs to be on police letterhead, so it's just wrong in multiple ways. I guess I really already knew this before, because we've already gotten a CBI clearance. But come on, we KNOW that they are the only ones who do a WHOLE STATE CLEARANCE so what else are we supposed to get!? (Can you see me pulling my hair out yet?) (BOO!!!)
• The Letter of Exemplification we got with Marc's long form birth certificate is not what we need. We also already had a feeling that was the case, but when you get this news on top of a bad day it just makes it worse. I called the county clerk of NY again just to make sure (I've learned to triple check things by now) that this was the proper next step, how much money I needed to send and, oh yeah, what's the turn-around time again? FOUR to SIX #$%& weeks. (Booo Hisss....throwing tomatoes)

Luckily for me, I have the sweetest friend in the world who is also adopting and happens to work in NYC, so I am mailing the birth cert and letter to her and she's going to get the authentication and seal for us. (yay yay yay yay yay yay YAY!!!) I can't even tell you what a load that is off my mind. Otherwise we could be waiting 3 more months for these document.

A few minutes later I got another good outstanding work-related call (YAY!) and decided to press my luck by checking the mail. In it I found................. drum roll please ......

.....

.....

...my sealed birth certificate. (Yaaaaaay) It's hard to know whether you're happy or sad or just exhausted after a day like this. Either way, this was the only appropriate thing to do:

Total costs: $60

A light at the end of the tunnel

I keep feeling like we're "this close" but just can't quite get there. Like one of those dreams where you're trying to run, but you're running in place. Or you have to get to school but you can't find any clothes that match, then you miss the bus, then you try to call your mom but you keep punching the wrong numbers on the phone. Hmmm...maybe that's just me.

Anyway...

I got a message from UPS that they'll be delivering something from VitalChek today. Yes folks, that would be Marc's birth certificate - the long one, not the short one - with letter of exemplification. The one that I ordered on 3/17 and paid extra for to get it in 2 - 3 days. And if you have a calendar you'll notice that today is 3/27.

Marc is on spring break this week and has been painting his little heart out trying to get our house ready to put on the market. Tomorrow I'll give him a respite from painting and drag him to get our police clearances then to get all of our dossier documents notarized. Fun stuff - this should be better than Spring Break '89 in Daytona. I might even flash him or something.

The turkey is in the oven

Marc says that to be funny when something is "in the works". What's in the works, you might ask? Well our HOMESTUDY of course! :) :) :) We signed off on it today.

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With the Easter holiday and the agency director being out of town, it's likely that it won't actually be sent outfor another week but, well, what's another week at this point, right?

.

From here it goes to AAI to be approved, then it gets sent in with our I-600 A and we wait for (another) fingerprinting appointment. Once that's done we wait for our I-171 H. That's the final okay from our government. When we have that, we send our Dossier to Ethiopia and wait some more. (See a recurring theme here?) As much paperwork and waiting as we still have left, this really is a big accomplishment.

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Costs:

$160 AAI

$670 USCIS (processing)

$160 USCIS (fingerprints)

$3000 Bethany

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(gulp...off to get a night job...)

Ayden's Friends - be one!

My post today is completely off the subject of adoption. I know the readers of this blog have a heart for others though - especially children - so I hope that you'll read this post and consider helping out a sweet little boy named Ayden. Ayden is the son of Tracey, a loving mommy I've come to know over the past year. Here's their story...

When you are three years old, you should be able to explore every inch of the world around you. You should be able to walk over to your mom to give her a huge bear hug and should be able to jump up to give your dad high fives. However, if you were born with Cerebral Palsy, as Ayden was, these simple pleasures enjoyed by properly developing 3 year olds can be enjoyed only with the assistance of special equipment, costly equipment.

One of these pieces of equipment is called a gait trainer, which Ayden uses at his physical therapy sessions, but the gait trainer belongs to the physical therapy center and must stay there. The freedom that Ayden enjoys at physical therapy sessions is halted at home because the cost of this piece of equipment is too astronomical for his
parents to be able to afford one of their own.

Even though the gait trainer has been recommended by his doctors and therapists as a vital piece of equipment to improve his quality of life, their many requests have been denied by Ayden's insurance. If you grant this wonderful little boy with his gait trainer, you would be truly giving him the whole world and giving him the chance to learn to possibly walk on his own two legs one day.

That letter comes from a great little website that some of Ayden's friends have set up. You can visit the site to read more about Ayden, see what donations have already been made, and to make a donation yourself. Even $1 will help.

I've also set up an ebay listing for one of the gorgeous necklaces that Karen makes for us. Bid with your heart, not with your wallet because ALL of the proceeds go to Ayden's Friends. Winning bidder gets free shipping and lots of love and gratitude from Ayden. Be sure to pass the link on to your friends and let them know what it's for. (Darn that eBay, they only let you raise money for certain charities, so I had to keep the listing kind of vague.)

How can you say no to a smile like this?

Did I forget to mention....

...that we are signing off on our home study this Thursday?

"heeeeee haw" as Fletcher would say! :)

You spin me right round baby right round

The NYC department of vital statistics has my head spinning right round this afternoon. Who knew that the hardest part of adopting would be getting a birth certificate!? Correction - *sealed* birth certificate....because I certainly have enough copies of our birth certificates by now. I'm going to be able to wall paper our living room with them soon.

After being transferred and being told to call different numbers EIGHT times, I finally got to a lady who could tell me how to get a sealed copy. They make it very easy for you (note the sarcasm there...). If you were born in New York, in one of the 5 boroughs, take note:

1st, you have to request a long form birth certificate with a letter of exemplification from the Department of Health. 212.788.4500.

2nd, you get that, then mail it allllll the way back to NY to the NY County Clerk where they will verify the signature on the letter. 646.386.5932.

3rd, you get that back, then mail it all the way back to NY again to the NY State Department of State, Certification Unit. 212.417.5747.

Well that was easy! (banging head against wall) Would it be quicker / easier / cheaper for me to fly there and courier the request around the city myself?

grumble grumble grumble....

Costs: $33.00

Finally something good in the mailbox

I've always been one of those weirdos who loves to check the mail. Well I love actually getting mail - good mail - letters, cards, I'll even admit to getting excited about a coupon once in awhile. But over the past few weeks I've actually found myself wishing it was later in the day so that I could get the mail. I've daydreamed about opening that little box and finding every completed form we need stuffed inside. Today was not exactly that day, but I did get two things I've been waiting on: Marc's birth certificates and the forms from my doctor. Of course nothing is ever easy. I now need to mail the birth certificates all the way back to New York to be sealed...same thing happened with mine because they just don't offer that compete service at once. And I realized that my doctor crossed a word out on my doctor forms which, from what I understand is a "no-no". But I'm not sure if that's with just the notarized forms or with this too. We'll see what I find out. Hopefully it will be sufficient for the home study and we can get it redone for the dossier if necessary.


Did I tell you that we picked up Marc's redone doctor letters yesterday afternoon? So now I just have to fax all of these forms to our SW and wait for her to finish writing the home study. OMGOsh - we could be sending in our home study next week!!!!

A Good Friday

Fletcher's checkup was this morning and dare I say we actually had fun!? We had a great ride into the city and saw so many exciting things (well, exciting for a two year old): tall buildings, tractors, a crane, multiple giant excavators, a fire truck, a zillion buses, a giant mail truck, dump trucks, construction men (Fletch told them "careful, don't fall down!" Awww...) and we even went through a "tunnel". Wowie, that's a lot of excitement.

At the doctor's office, they make you undress your child so they can get weight, height and do the general exam. Well Fletcher decided that he'd like to take his pull-up off as well and try to run around the halls naked. Oy, now that was embarrassing. It's like they know that you won't/can't yell at them in front of a doctor, so they push just as far as they can. So there I was trying to act like Mother of the Year by patronizingly explaining that those were his private parts and that only mommy, daddy and the doctor were allowed to see them. I finally broke down and gave him a "That's one!" He immediately came back and got his pull-up on. Victory!

He really was so excited to go to the doctor. I guess he doesn't remember all those shots as a baby and he's matured so much since the last time we were there. All the way there he talked about how the doctor was going to listen to his belly and look in his ears and mouth like on Elmo Goes to the Doctor. After all that I explained how the nurse was going to poke his finger and take some blood. He just watched in amazement that blood was pouring out of his finger. I was quite surprised and he was just excited about getting a band aid. Then for the part where I was sure he'd lose it - the flu shot. I told him he was going to get medicine in his leg and it might hurt at first but then it would stop...and that I had a special treat for him after (a sucker). That shot was over before he even knew what happened and we left with absolutely NO TEARS.

My little man is so cool. :)

We also got his doctor's note about his health, so we can check that off the list. Now if only my doctor's forms, Marc's doctor's letter and our last letter of recommendation would all come in the mail today. A girl can hope, can't she!?

One step forward, two steps back

Do you have Paula Abdul stuck in your head now? :) Me too!

I am happy to say that we had our last home visit last night. Our SW came over to do the follow up on our home safety inspection and to meet Fletcher. HSI went well, no biggie there. Fletch was, well, Fletch. He wanted to show the SW all of his books. Then as she and I tried to leave his room to go chat, he pushed me out the door and told her "Get in here now!" Oy vey! It was cute because he wanted her all to himself to play, but my goodness, he sounded like a two year old tyrant. And we never say "get in here now" to him - where did that come from?!?! Oh well...I'm sure we're not the worst parents she's ever seen.

So she is finishing her home study write up this week, then we're waiting on medical letters and Fletcher's doctor's appt (this Friday) and we're DONE with the home study. We should be able to review it next week and get it in the mail.

Our minor setbacks were:

• As expected, my certified birth certificate was incorrect. We now have to send it back to FL to the Secretary of State to be sealed. Lucky for us, this is for the dossier and we do not need it for the home study to be complete.
• The notary stamp date on Marc's doctor's letter was different from the date on the letter, so we have to have that redone. His doctor is practically within walking distance from our house, so that shouldn't be a big deal to get redone.

Jackie's dr. letter is in the mail to us. Fletcher's dr. appt. is on Friday. My dr. forms are in the mail to us. We're cruisin'!

Costs: $20 for state seal

Don't mess with Texas!

Well I'm not from Texas, but if I was I probably would have yelled that at the bank today.

Of all things you don't want to do while in the adoption process, buying a house is probably at the top of the list. And we weren't really planning on buying a new house. We just happened to see one in a great location. For a great price. So we thought maybe we'd take a look. Which led to me yelling at the 12 year old kid at the bank because he was more interested in flirting with the teller and slacking off than helping me with a home loan. I *may* have told him I would go somewhere else if I was inconveniencing him. But come on, I get three letters a week from this bank telling me I'm a preferred customer and all the wonderful things they can do for me. Now I try to call in a favor and I get this. Anyway... I'm sure I'm not the first or last woman to yell at him. Call it training for marriage.

The nice thing about looking into home loans when you're adopting is that you actually have MORE paperwork than the bank could ever want. This is how the conversation went:

Bank lady: I'll need your 2007 W2's.

Me: Here, I have my W2's from 2007 as well as my state and federal tax returns. Would you like 2004, 2005 and 2006 as well?

BL: Um, no. How about paycheck stubs?

Me: Sure, and here are some notarized letters from our employers verifying length of employment and income. You know...in case that will help.

BL: Do you have any stocks, bonds, other assets?

Me: (clunking down a one inch stack of statements from stocks, 2 mutual fund accounts, 401k, 403b, 529b, 2 life insurance policies) Yes, I think I might have a few.

Well you get the picture. I wanted to say "Don't test me lady. I'm the QUEEN of paperwork!"

And while I was there (you know, since I had already scared all of the teenagers working there) I thought hmm....I might as well get the "financial statement" for my dossier. I won't even go into that story. But at least it's d-o-n-e!! And I seem to remember apologizing and promising to bake them cookies or something.

Last night Marc picked up his letter and forms from his doctor. My doctor called today so that I could read him the results of my TB test (self service - nice) and I appear to be fine, so he's mailing my forms for that. And my dear friend Pam delivered the sweetest letter of recommendation to me last night over girl talk, grilled cheese and fries. What could be better!?

Chugga chugga

I had my doctor's appointment yesterday and got all sorts of items accomplished:

HIV Test - check
TB Test - ouch, er, I mean, check
Drug Screen - check
Doctor's letter - check

I completely heart my doctor. I see my OB who delivered Fletcher because, well, I'm never really sick (except for the perpetual cold) so I don't have a GP that I go to. Anyway, my OB has got to be about 80 years old - and I'm not even kidding. My favorite nurse in his office (who doesn't look a day over 50) told me once that she had been working with him for 40 years. And I know he did other medical work and was also an army doctor before this. He's so old that he actually hand wrote the letter for me. He doesn't even have a computer in his office! But he is just the sweetest, most caring man you'll ever meet...the kind of guy I'd pick for a grandpa (If I didn't already have my own awesome grandpa that is).

Today I'm picking up one of our Letters of Recommendation from a friend and tomorrow Marc picks up his doctor's letter.

I've gotten a lot of dossier stuff done as well, although I can't go too fast because we don't want it to be outdated. Honestly, the dossier is a lot easier than I thought.

We're moving along...

One small step for the Browns...

...One giant leap for our home study!

We found out today that both of our FBI background checks came back on Friday and, as I suspected, we're relatively upstanding citizens. Sweet! And, we finished 14 hours of training time this weekend.

Check and CHECK! That's the sound of my home study list getting shorter. To finish our home study we're now waiting on:

• Letter from J's doctor
• My dr. appt next week and letter from him
• Fletcher's doctor's form
• Marc's doctor's letter (in progress)
• Tax returns for 2007 (in progress)
• Home safety inspection follow up (3/10)

We're "this close" to being done with this phase of the process and have started gathering (well, ordering at least) documents for our dossier. I think I'm eager to get the home study finished so that I can feel like I've completed or accomplished something, even thought it's just one step...