Little Momma

When we met Macy & Felix in Ethiopia, we were surprised that she wasn't more nurturing towards him. We had assumed that she had taken on a mothering role since their own mother was so sick. The reality was that they barely even interacted. Maybe it was because they were both distracted by everything else going on.

Now that we've been home for a month (!), I catch little glimpses of her being a sweet big sister. Sometimes she picks him up and carries him up the front stairs so he can play outside. Yesterday I heard her saying "Fikreab nah! Makinah!" Which, loosely, means "Come here, we're going in the car!"

I found her getting him dressed (and accessorized)...

Hear Ye, Hear Ye

I'll be closing my Etsy store at the end of June to make way for a new adventure. (Teeny-tiny sneak peek here.)

I wanted to thank everyone who has purchased necklaces from my Etsy shop. Your support means the world to our family. You helped us to bring our kids home! Extra special thanks go to Karen of Oliver's. Karen is both the talent and the muscle behind the beautiful necklace you're wearing. Without her, we'd be in much more "post adoption debt" than we currently are. ;)

So....if you're had your eye on one of these~


Now is the time!

Surprise

Macy can read! In Amharic at least.


We took the kids to Habesha, an Ethiopian restaurant just outside of downtown Denver. Macy was shy at first and the ladies there were sure that she didn't speak Amharic, but she eventually opened up and started chatting with them.

One of the employees there was from Awassa, so we chatted about that. It was nice to hear Amharic again, ask them about certain words Macy says that we don't understand, and especially to see Macy eat like a horse! We all did really.

At one point, Macy picked up one of their brochures and started saying words. She could actually read it! I don't know how well she can read. I could tell there was a word that she was sounding out. But still, that's pretty impressive! And it made us feel good about the decision to go ahead and start her in Kindergarten this fall.

One of the employees wrote down the name of some Ethiopian spices, then sent us down the street to the Ethiopian market to pick them up. Marc is going to try his hand at beef tibs next week. The waitress was sweet to explain to him how to make several things. Except for doro wat which she said takes a very long time and is too complicated. She did offer to come to our house on her day off and make it for us. Gotta love that!

Say CHEESE!

Before we left for Ethiopia, Fletch went through a sneak-into-mom-and-dad's-bed-every-night phase. It was exhausting because he'd always end up with his feet in my face. None of us were getting much sleep.

One day we were out running errands and drove past Chuck E. Cheese. We'd never been there, but Fletch had seen the commercials enough times to tell me "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM that's Chuck E. Cheese! Where a kid can be a kid!!!! Can we go?" Clever little bugger. I promised him if he slept in his bed for 10 nights he could go.

So he did. And we went. They all had a great time!



When we were in Ethiopia, one of the people at the guesthouse told Macy that America was like heaven. I think it's living up to her expectations.


Fletcher declared it "Cool and awesome and fun".

This little piggy

Remember "this little piggy"? We tell it like this:

This little piggy went to the Merkato
This little piggy stayed at the guest home
This little piggy ate injera
This little piggy had none
And this little piggy went nah nah nah nah nah
Allllll the way home

This little piggy will eat anything...

And lots of it!

Doctor visits

Marc and I took Macy and Felix to the pediatrician yesterday afternoon. The last time I took Fletch in, I asked the doctor if I could bring the new kids there as well, or if they needed to go to a doctor who specializes in adopted children (like the adoption clinic at Children's Hospital). He looked at me like I had insulted his intelligence and told me of course I could bring them there. In fact, he had adopted a little girl from Russia, so he was part of the club.

So we brought the kids in. And they referred us to Children's Hospital because they "really have no way of knowing all of the things that they should be checking." Hmmm.

We did start their immunizations. That was fun. We got a prescription for something to get rid of their scalp ringworm. Oh, and little buckets to collect their poop in. Sweet. I can't wait to make the appointment at Children's so we can draw blood. I'm sure that'll be totally awesome too.

The big kids...

The "big kids" (Macy & Fletcher) are officially registered for school this fall! We dropped their registration packets off this morning. They'll be attending the same school, here in Evergreen, only Macy will be in Kindergarten and Fletcher will be in Preschool. I think they're both really going to enjoy it.

I, on the other hand, had flashes of The New Adventures of Old Christine and the "meanie moms" when we went in. There was a group of tanned moms dressed in cute little tennis outfits talking about going to the day spa after dropping the kids off. Yikes. I'll be at home turning my compost heap. (For the record, I'm sure they are perfectly nice people.)

We have some work ahead of us this summer to get Macy speaking a little more English. She'll also have the assistance of an ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher, which should be extremely helpful. She knows how to write her numbers and letters in both Amharic and English, but gets a few of them confused in English - like T and Y. So we'll see how she does.

Fletcher was probably more excited about the big playground than anything else, but he did poke around the two preschool classrooms and declare them "cool". Seeing Macy write her numbers and letters and hearing her count has put a little pressure on him. Yesterday he asked me if we could practice counting just the two of us.

And Felix, well he gets stuck at home with me! At least he'll get to play with all the toys without having to fight for them.

Settling in.

We went to two birthday parties last weekend. Since that's on the list of "things you probably shouldn't do with kids who have been home for only a week" I had planned to stay home with Macy and Felix and let Marc take Fletcher to the parties. By the end of the week we all needed to get out of the house though, so we decided to brave it with all three kids. They did great!

Felix is such a trooper. He tends to get bullied by Macy and Fletcher. When they play together, the older kids take what they want from him and he tends to get knocked down a lot. But by himself he is such a joyful little boy. He loved to pretend and explore and is very self sufficient.

Macy did well, but started to melt down towards the end of the day and the whining began. She tried to push a kid out of a swing because she wanted it, then fought over a balloon. But after being out all day, with no nap, in all the excitement, I can't blame her much. She did have fun though. I hope she doesn't expect to do that every weekend.

After a hard day of playing...

And these were the pj outfits they chose. I bought Macy these headbands thinking they'd be cute in her hair. But they all wear them (including Fletch) in more of an 80s / Flashdance style.

Either Fletcher has learned Amharic in the last week and a half, or he has made up a new language that he is using. Excellent. Three kids I can't understand now.

Travel Journal ~ April 29th - May 1st

In a last-ditch effort to make up for our other failed shopping attempts, we went out yet again this morning to finish up. We couldn't resist stopping to take a photo of this little cafe...

That's right - everybody loves Obama!

Shopping...

These little guys would not leave us. They wanted money, which I think a few people gave them, but they liked the suckers that Marc and Scott (aka Mr. Johnson) were giving out. The boy on the left was wearing slacks that had had the cuffs completely let down, yet they were still about 3 inches too short on him and old old lace-up dress shoes.

Later we had the opportunity to meet Bethany's new Director of African Adoption. I forget his name now, but he reminded us all of James Earl Jones.

We were supposed to meet him at his hotel, but we all had the kids, so Milkiyas asked us to sit in the van (taxi) in the parking lot and wait. We waited and waited and waited...with kids...in the hot sun. It was miserable. When he finally arrived, everyone was a little irritated (not to mention sweaty) and the kids were starting to go nuts.

I think he had really just planned to say hello to us and go about his business that day, but people started asking some pretty pointed questions and giving honest feedback about our adoption experiences thus far. After awhile of talking he told us that we needed to be "culturally sensitive" (since we had the kids with us) and go somewhere more private to talk.

He ended up going to the Gelgela orphanage with us, which was our next stop that day. Even though we were all a bit peeved, I'm glad that he did go with us. He and Marc talked for a long time at Gelgela. Marc found out that he was from Zimbabwe, but left due to the turmoil. He said that he could never return to his country or he would be hanged. Marc found him to be very interesting.

Gelgela was quite the experience. It's more what you would picture a third-world orphanage to look like. There was one room for boys and one for girls, both lined with bunk beds. There were no lights on, so this picture is poor, but you can see that the boys are sitting on the bottom of one of the bunk beds here...

The babies were in a separate room that was lined with cribs, two babies to a crib. Some wore cloth diapers, some disposable, and one was bare-bottomed in the crib and the nanny would just move her to a different spot when she peed. It was definitely a hard thing to see. They could really use some items to get the babies up and around - exersaucers, bouncers, even a play mat. Heck, even a blanket on the floor for them to crawl around on!

The Johnsons (who are completely awesome people)...

...thought to bring donations for the kids at Gelgela, which was our reason for going there. They had this Mary Poppins type bag that they just kept pulling more and more and more stuff out of. The kids went nuts - they loved it!

The Johnsons also brought this collapsible soccer net, so they got a game going in the yard.

We also got to meet two little ones who are being adopted by other Bethany families who will be traveling soon to get them.

After dinner we all unwound with dinner at Lime Tree. The kids got to ride in an elevator for the first time, and I picked up a children's book "Addis from A-Z" at the bookstore there.

Thursday~

Thursday was a weird day. We thought we were all going somewhere at 9am, but the taxi never showed up. We waited until 11:00 and then the guys finally decided to venture out for something - knock-off DVDs maybe. We were supposed to go to the transition house at noon for a coffee ceremony, but no one showed up to get us until 3pm. By that time, the Johnsons were packing up to leave, several kids were napping, and everyone was a little disappointed about having sat around all day waiting, when this was our last day in Addis.

While we were waiting, one of the ladies at the guesthouse did Macy's hair for her...

Then at 3:00 when Milkiyas showed up, everyone kind of backed out of the coffee ceremony because we were packing and getting ready to leave in a few hours. A few of the guys ended up going and leaving us girls at home to pack and handle the kids. I felt bad for skipping out on it, but the day was just a big mess.

At Shalom, they had the coffee ceremony. The director of the orphanage and his wife were there. They gave speeches and handed out traditional clothing for the kids to bring home. The Director of African Adoption (aka James Earl Jones) was there, all the nannies and Bethany staff were there. Talk about guilt. I feel horrible for missing it.

Thursday night~

We headed to the airport for a long flight home. The lines were horrible and it was already 9pm, so the kids were tired. Felix was still sick and just wanted to be held. Macy, we think, was freaking out a bit. She kept running away from us, or running through the line, or back through security areas. It was a mess -- and what can you do?

We were separated in the plane, so I took Felix and Marc took Macy. Felix actually went right down to sleep. We had a bassinet, which attaches to the wall in a bulkhead seat. What a life saver! We both slept for the whole first leg of the flight - Addis to Rome - then slept again for a few hours of the loooong Rome to Washington, DC flight. Finally, fed up with chasing Macy through the plane and cleaning up spills after her, Marc switched with me and took Felix while I tended to Macy.

The DC to Denver flight was good. It was around nap time, so both kids slept. I was so happy that we had already gone through customs in DC, so we just got our bags and went home once we got to Denver.

Actually, one of the baggage people at DIA came up and started a conversation with us. He was from Ethiopia, but has lived in Denver for 8 years. Then a female employee, also from Ethiopia originally, came up to chat. The man took our luggage to the shuttle bus for us and wouldn't accept a tip. "My gift to you" he said.

On the way to the shuttle he waved down an airport maintenance person, who got out of his truck to come talk to the kids in Amharic. Then our shuttle bus driver also ended up being Ethiopian. We felt like we were just let into a special club or something. When the shuttle arrived at our stop, the driver came around, pushed two men off the bus and told them to make way for us. It was too funny.

When we arrived home the kids freaked out over the dog. Yikes. Felix is warming up to him - meaning he doesn't start screaming when he sees the dog. Macy, on the other hand, is petrified. I know that they don't keep dogs as pets in Ethiopia. They're used as guard dogs. But I wonder if maybe she was attacked by one in the past.

Other than that, they loved seeing their rooms, new clothes, and all the toys. And I was in heaven seeing Fletcher again!

Travel Journal ~ April 28th

On Tuesday we went out shopping without the kids in the morning. Actually, the babies came along, but the big kids stayed at the transition house. That's another thing that I loved about the New Flower. The kids were there for several days, got to know everyone who worked there, the employees loved the kids, played with them, talked to them, etc. So when it was time for us to get out for a little while without them, they were happy to stay back with the ladies who work there.

Anyway, we went out to do some souvenir shopping. It was fun, but we probably needed a whole day to find all the stuff that we were looking for. We cut the trip short so that we could get back to the guesthouse for lunch, pick up the kids and get to the Embassy by 1pm. I think we got in about an hour of shopping.

The Embassy appointment itself was a little anticlimactic. I think we'll consider the day we met as our "gotcha day" instead. I, sadly, have no photos of the Embassy happenings because you have to check your camera at the door. You basically show up, turn in your I-600 and wait your turn. There was a big group from another agency in front of us, so I think we waited about an hour. Maybe it was less, but Macy was melting down, beating other kids up, and Felix was sick, so it seemed like a long time.

On a funny side-note, I met Lis there, a fellow Coloradoan. She and I had never met, but had emailed right before our trips. We found that we had the same Embassy date and said "maybe we'll see each other!" It was fun to chat, until the kids went nuts.

So...you wait in a big, hot room until your name is called, then you go upstairs, answer some questions to a lady behind glass, and that's it. You're parents.

Unsatisfied with our morning shopping trip, the husbands decided to drop all of us off at the guesthouse and go back out shopping again. We thought they'd be home in an hour or two, but they ended up being gone for.ever. Michelle and I were exhausted (and a little ticked) when they finally got back hours later. Macy & Moges were hard to entertain and keep up with. Macy was brutalizing Moges and I think this was the day when I introduced her to "time out".

All we wanted to do when the guys got home was eat and relax a bit, but Marc made the decision that we'd go out to dinner, with the kids. The Johnsons and Webers stayed back, so it was us and the Mellits family. We walked down the street to Asqual, where Helen told us the locals go to eat.

It was our lucky night - there was a wedding party going on! Their dining room was all set up with wooden stools in a long row, small tables in front of them, a big buffet table and a band. It was an awesome way to experience some true Ethiopian culture. Macy was mesmerized by the music. It was so much fun and, despite being tired and irritated, I was so happy that we went.

The lighting was bad inside, so these photos are pretty poor quality. Here is the band and the buffet table. Funny, we got there before the party started, and Marc was contemplating "Should I order off the menu, or go with the buffet?" not knowing that it was actually for the wedding party.



Our food - Macy & Felix both gobbled it up!

The bride and groom entering. She looked completely pissed off the whole time!

And that was it for Tuesday. It was such a long day, but ended on a fun note.

Travel Journal ~ April 27th

Monday was a no-power day. Each district in Addis has a day where there is no power from 8 am to 8 pm. I guess they're not quite up to "smart-grid" technology yet. Some stores and restaurants have generators, but most places just go without for the day.

Although our embassy appointments were scheduled for Tuesday, you have to go on Monday to pay all of the fees for some reason. The husbands took on that task while us women-folk stayed back at home with the kids.

Marc had to borrow money because none of the ATMs seemed to be working. We had planned to get cash the day before we left Denver, but had the big snow storm and couldn't get out. We were able to get $500 at the airport, but had to use that to pay for our hotel since their credit card system was down at the time. We were perpetually behind the entire trip. If you're going to Ethiopia - bring all the cash you'll need!

When the guys returned from the embassy we took all of the kids to the BCS office where we took photos for their wall, filled out our I-600s together and had coffee.

On the way back from BCS, Milkiyas took us to the weavers' shop. One of BCS's many ministries is to train people for jobs so that they can stay off the street and support their families. These people were trained in weaving and made all sorts of traditional clothing, scarves, etc.

That evening all of the families went out to an Italian restaurant that was walking distance from our hotel. Felix was good, but Macy wanted to wander around and we finally realized that this was probably the first restaurant she had been to. We struggled a bit. It's hard not to parent like you normally would because all of these people are watching you. I mean, you don't want to give the local people a horrible impression of the Americans that are adopting their children....but they just tend to let the kids do what they want, rather than saying no. That's hard for me to do.

Anyway...as Macy was wondering, one of the waitresses spoke to her in Amharic then tried to tell me in broken English that "she loves her and they are going to America". I don't know if Macy said she loves us and we're taking her to America or that we love her and we're taking her to America...but I'll take either one at this point!

Travel Journal ~ April 26th

The kids slept in until about 8:00 am this morning. It was like a little slice of heaven since Fletch is a habitual 5:30 am riser.

The Johnsons and Webers went to church with Milkiyas...or went to his church...but didn't actually see him there. The Mellits headed back to the airport to pick up their luggage that had been delayed. We sat and played with the kids, quickly realizing this was going to be a very long day if we were going to be hanging out at the guesthouse entertaining them all day.

Caleb and the man who guards the compound / attends to the gate both loved playing with the kids, which was a great help. Caleb staged these photos of the kids dunking...

Felix watched Caleb pump up the soccer ball, then tried to do it himself. He got the needle in the hole and started pumping after watching Caleb do it only once. I'm amazed at how observant he is!
Snack time...

After church and lunch, we decided to join the rest of the families in going to the Shalom transition center to meet their children. It was fun to see them go through the same surreal car ride and the same "Wow, our lives are about to change forever!" feelings that we had experienced the day before. We were also able to video tape the other couples meeting their children.

Milkiyas explained to Macy & Felix that we were going there to pick up the other kids, and that we wouldn't leave them there. They handled it pretty well and Macy was happy to see Moges again, but she was ready to leave pretty quickly.

All of the happy families...

Back at the guesthouse we ordered traditional Ethiopian food for dinner and pasta for the kids. (After Macy had a sick stomach at Shalom that afternoon, the nanny told us that the kids shouldn't be eating that kind of food and that they like spaghetti, pasta, pastini and rice.) When the food arrived they were not happy to be eating pasta and they dug into the injera and veggies anyway. They've been eating all sorts of food since without issue.

Macy had a rough day. She did a lot of fighting with Moges and, unfortunately, it was her starting it 99% of the time. She seems to think that everything belongs to her. The ladies at the guesthouse were translating and telling me "she is very bossy". She kept saying "give it to me" and "it's mine"about everything. If someone told her no she would hit them and/or throw anything within reach and/or throw herself on the ground crying. If Moges or Felix had something she wanted she would wrestle them to the ground and take it from them.

Marc and I were spent physically and emotionally by the end of the day, so we went to bed early with the kids.

Travel Journal ~ April 25th

Saturday morning Abera & Yemene came to pick us up to take us to the transition home. (The transition home is where the children are moved after we passed court. Our agency brings them up from Awassa, or wherever they are, and begins to prepare them for their families and coming to America.) So we hop in the van, ready to meet our children.

Instead, they take us to Mount Entoto. Very interesting to see. It's the highest mountain in Addis (maybe the highest in Ethiopia?) and is where the capital was originally located, so that the king could look out on his land and see anyone preparing to attack. There is a small museum with some amazing artifacts - old gifts from other countries like a diamond encrusted crown from the queen of France - things you'd expect to see in a much higher-security establishment, not in a one-room building.

The view of Addis from Mount Entoto...

The first church in Ethiopia...

The current church on the same grounds...



The king and queen's palace...


After seeing Mount Entoto and the palace we thought "Okay, now we're really meeting our kids!" Only we were dropped off at the Jupiter Hotel again so that we could "take lunch" as Milkiyas says. Talk about a roller coaster...every time we got that butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling, something else came up.

Finally we were on our way to the Shalom transition house. I was surprised by how nice it was. Marc described it as a typical suburban home. I wouldn't say that it was like a new suburban home, but it was similar to some of the older (1970's or 80's) homes built here in Colorado.

When we arrived I think it was Moges (the Johnson's son) who came outside first. As we were talking to him, Macy ran out behind him to say hello. Marc asked for a hug and was granted one, but then she wanted to run back inside to get her shoes, so I didn't get much more than a smile. We went inside, expecting to see Felix, but one of the nannies was upstairs getting him ready. When he was brought down, he was wearing baby pants, a purple girl's shirt with bows on the sleeves and a plaid shirt over it. He looked so funny.

Felix was very interested in the video camera. In Awassa they told us that he is very "mechanical" and loves to take things apart and put them back together. I kind of laughed to myself at that thinking "he's one and a half, how mechanical can he be?" but they were right. He's very interested in anything electronic and wants to know how everything works. Show him once and he can do it himself. It's amazing!



At one point, Macy went upstairs to change clothes, then came back down and sang a song for us...



We were there for maybe about 45 minutes to an hour total. It was kind of uncomfortable because everyone is sitting around watching you, how the kids react to you, how you interact with them, etc.

Milkiyas eventually said that we should all go now. And by "all" he meant ALL. Marc and I had talked about the possibility of this happening. According to our agency, we would go visit the kids several times, then they'd eventually come back with us to our hotel. Somehow we had the feeling that they might just let us take them though. Although we were happy about this, we weren't quite prepared. Our report several months ago said that Felix was in the process of potty training, yet he was still in diapers when we got there. They also had him drinking some sort of powdered milk, so we needed to get to a store for diapers, wipes and milk.

Off we go...


For dinner, the ladies at the guesthouse made injeera for the kids complete with cabbage, carrots, green beans, spinach and I think doro wat as well. When the ladies sat it down the kids both looked at it and didn't move. Maybe they didn't understand my "okay, dig in!" After a moment I tore off some injeera and put it with green beans into Felix' mouth. This must have been the signal Macy was looking for because she dug in at that point, then Felix followed. It's a bit awkward to eat this saucy, somewhat mushy food with no utinsels and only injeera, but these kids knew exactly what they were doing. It was hilarious to watch Felix, this tiny little man with looooong fingers throw his injeera on top of a piece of meat and gobble it up as if he'd been eating that way for 50 years.

Bedtime was a little shaky. Macy actually went upstairs saying "pajama" and Felix followed taking his own clothes off and putting on his pj's. It cracks me up to watch still because our 4 year old won't even get himself dressed.

The kids tried to play around for awhile (we learned later that they're allowed to play until they fall asleep at the transition center). After much shenanigans I finally laid down with Macy on the cot and Marc took Felix on the bed. We turned the lights off and said "matah matah". Macy fell asleep quickly, but Felix cried for quite some time. Bedtime has gotten progressively better since then.

The Johnson's had arrived that afternoon, followed by the Webers later that night, and we all sat on the porch talking late into the evening. It was such a nice way to unwind after an emotional day. I was really feeling overwhelmed at that point, so it was great to just relax and laugh. We turned in around 11:30 and heard the Mellits family arrive a bit later. The gang's all here!